one hundred & twenty-five pounds

125 125 125 125 125 125 125
this is what i weigh with my period. i haven't been so happy about my weight in a while. the last time i was 125 i was mad because i gained and became that weight. but now i dropped down to it, which is so great. i broke the 127 barrier!

yesterday, like i said in my last post, i went to my friends house, i did have popcorn, there was butter and oil. i also had 3 bananas, a marshmellow, and some pixie sticks.

but today i'm fasting again, tomorrow i'm going to atlantic city. i'm not going to let loose and eat whatever the fuck i want. my mom wants to go to the big candy shop they have in atlantic city to get a jelly bean elephant or something. i'll probably get a little bit of dark chocolate (the lowest calorie chocolate) so i don't seem suspicious. and since i'll be eating those two days i'm going to only have water to drink. i wanna bring my protein shake mix, but i don't wanna have to use gross regular milk. i'm not sure what to do about that one. and i'll stick to soups/sea food for my meals, along with the "i'm soo full. i think my stomach shrunk or something" excuse.

idk if i can do this, but by friday/saturday i wanna be 123. i'll fast on friday if i have to. 120 is my first GW, while breaking 127 was my first goal. while i am happy i got down to 125, i am not happy being it.

1st gw: 120
2nd gw: 118
3rd gw: 115
4th gw: 110
5th gw: 104
i'm not sure if i wanna go lower than that. some of my friends know i have issues with food, and i don't wanna lose my girlish figure, but i wanna look sexy/feel sexy.

right now my stomach is looking a lot flatter, but my thighs are still gross and squishy and jiggly. my hips and butt look the same to me too. i'm hoping that my clothes will fit a little better now that i'm 7lbs lighter

i'm finally feeling like i fit in at the gym. like i'm not working out then going home and binging. i feel like the people there notice that kinda stuff like they realize when someone looks thinner or hasn't made changes in their bodies appearance.

i'm going food shopping today with my mom, i'm going to make sure she doesn't get cookies or anything i'll binge on. i'll probably get stuff for me to make gluten free pizza, i've been craving it so bad. but i'm not gonna have it for a while.

i'm gonna catch up on all yous guys blogs, adios :)